A Happy Whack Upside Your Melon

Just what I needed today. The last two days have been as dreary as it gets here. Overcast, rain mixed with mist mixed with downpour. And, of course, the wind. If it ever suddenly stopped blowing, we’d all fall over.

Now, here’s Roy’s memo in my in-box with the headline "Unhappy People." OK, I can take a hint. Can You?

Unhappy People

Unhappypeoplemmmemo Have you ever noticed how unhappy people always want to share their unhappiness with you? It may come in the form of a whine, a complaint, a rant, or sanctimonious "constructive criticism," but come it most certainly will.

The thing to remember when an unhappy person begins spraying unhappiness is this: It’s not really about you. It’s about them. And the wounds they carry. So try not to internalize it.

Do you remember the Jewish father played by Roberto Benigni in Life is Beautiful? He illustrated the idea that happiness can be chosen in spite of unhappy circumstances; you are not a product of your environment. You are a product of your choices.

Even weirder than unhappy people wanting to share their unhappiness with you is the fact that happy people generally keep their happiness to themselves. Why are we like this?

I have a theory about leaving tips on tables at restaurants: the size of the tip isn’t really an expression of your judgment regarding the quality of service you’ve received. It’s an expression of your generosity, the bigness of your heart. It’s not really about the waiter or waitress. It’s about you.

This idea can be especially fun when you receive truly abominable service. That’s when you can leave a tip that’s totally over the top and then smile all the way to your car as you contemplate all the different ways the story might end:

1. The waiter, recognizing the tip as a gesture……

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